Welcome my friends and fellow casanovas in training! Here I present you with a go to manual on the art of authentic masculine expression and the keys to mastering the psychology behind female attraction. This book is intended to bring you from square one as a beta chode who hasn’t left his mother’s basement in twelve years to an alpha pimp able to seduce the most attractive women at will. Now, I’m not gonna lie, this journey will not be easy and will most definitely be full of many ups and downs, but I assure you, if you follow the guidelines that I present here and effectively shift your mindset and behavior, the rewards will be well worth your time and effort. So get reading, get approaching, and most of all, GET LAID!!!
Tip number 1 on how to get laid. If you really want to get laid, STOP TRYING TO GET LAID!!! Ok I know, this is very counterintuitive. But the thing is, when you go out and about trying to get laid, you project a certain neediness. You feel as if you are lacking something, that you need to get laid. Instead of having more important things to focus on, you devote all of your energy to trying to insert you penis into a wet hole. And 99.99999% of the time this fails miserably. Why? Because women despise neediness. They hate it with a passion. I would venture to say that nothing is more of a turn-off to women than neediness. Not even bad breath and body odor or a 2 inch micro-penis.
Ok, so I know what you are probably thinking. You obviously bought this book because you want to get laid, and therefore you are trying to get laid. And that’s fine. But here is the key thing that you want to keep in mind. When interacting with women, you do not want to obsess over needing the girl to have sex with you. In fact, you ideally should not feel as though you need it at all. Your focus should be on creating an emotional connection with her in the moment. You want to focus on being present with her, amusing yourself, and above all, having fun.
Now believe me, this was not an easy task for me. I spent years going out and trying to get laid. I tried every technique and every seduction tactic you can possibly think of. I’ve spent more time researching this topic than I’d even care to share. And what did I get for it. Nothing. Nada. Zip. No wet holes. No sex. No getting laid. And why? Because my neediness was repulsive. It’s like I would douse myself in sex repellent and wonder why women didn’t want to fuck me. So after years of trying to get laid I finally realized I needed to change up my game. So here’s what I did.
Become present - Now, I know this is talked about constantly, especially if you are into spirituality or new-agey stuff, but the reason it’s talked about so frequently is because IT WORKS! If neediness is woman repellent than presence is like a pussy magnet. Because presence is literally the opposite of neediness. The more present and immersed in the now that you become, the less you feel a need for anything. You are content with simply being. The key is to sense the awareness within you, the fact that who you really are is not some aspect of your life experience but is in fact rooted in the one experiencing it all. When you can sense this inner observer and know yourself as that, you become naturally more content, and inner tension will dissolve. So do meditation, observe your thoughts, fully experience the flow of sensation here and now. Practice this and you will surely be on your way to getting laid!
Discover your purpose- If you have some sort of higher purpose other than women and your focus isn’t constantly on getting into a girl’s pants, then you will be far less needy and women will respond with greater interest. When getting laid isn’t exactly on the top of your to-do list (it can be close to the top though now worries) then your ability to attract the opposite sex is enhanced greatly. Your feelings of desperation and try-hardness will diminish and women will sense this. Your purpose could be as simple as to have fun or as extreme as to become the most enlightened human being to ever walk the planet. It really doesn’t matter. Just find a purpose and make it your main focus at all times.
Self-amuse- When your actions are based solely on self-amusement as opposed to getting others to like you, you instantly become more attractive. You must learn to dictate your own party within your own reality. YOU decide what is funny. YOU decide what you feel like doing. YOU decide what is cool and what’s not. It’s your movie, no one else’s. So what is funny to you? Whatever it is, focus on that and then laugh your ass off. Even if people think you are weird, who gives a fuck? As long as you are genuinely having a good time, that is all that matters. And women find this overwhelmingly attractive. Trust me.
Play the character- If you are used to being extremely needy with women, it can be really hard to shut off that mechanism in your brain. Trust me, I get it. So here is a great exercise for you to do. Pretend that you are being cast for a movie where you have to play a super-attractive badass-type personality. In other words, you are the fucking man. Women adore you. Men envy you. You are cooler than the other side of the other side of the pillow. Sexiness oozes from your pores like honey from a bee hive. You can smell the fresh pussy juice as you walk by the most gorgeous girls, just drenching their panties as they get a whiff of your god-like superhuman essence. Anyway, you get what I’m saying. Play the character. Think of Adrian Grenier’s character in Entourage or David Duchovny in Californication. Pretend you are getting paid millions of dollars to play the character perfectly. Remember, you can be whoever the fuck you want to be. Our personalities are only as fixed as we make them with our most practiced thoughts, behaviors, and beliefs.
Yolo Bitches!- Remember, life is short as FUCK. It could end at any second. You have no idea how much longer you have on this planet. So why not live every moment to the fullest? Why not do what makes YOU happy and makes YOU feel good? Live life in the context of death. Learn to let go and be completely free from outcome. You might as well dude, because pretty soon you will be dead. This is a fact. Act in ways that push your comfort zone and make you feel alive. Pretend that you are right on the brink of death. Live on the razor’s edge of life. Like Helen Keller said “Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.” So live it that way.
Also, keep in mind that once you start hooking up with attractive women it becomes super easy to drop the neediness. The hardest part is getting over the initial hump when you have no girls. So practice these tips until you start getting those lays and it will become progressively easier to let go of all those needy feelings.
Female Psychology- Since the beginning of contemplative thought, some of the greatest mysteries to have ever plagued the minds of men include questions like “What really caused the big bang?” “Where did biological life come from?” “Are we alone in the Universe?” and “What exactly happens after we die?” But no man on this Earth has ever faced a greater mystery than this “What the fuck is going on in that damn girl’s brain!?!” I can’t say I have the exact answer for you, because to be honest I still don’t really know, but I do have some insights. Here goes.
SOS(Shiny Object Syndrome) Women, like moths to a flame, are attracted to “shiny objects”. In other words, they are attracted to the highest value object in their immediate environment. Now you may be thinking “Sure maybe club chicks with ADD behave like this, but Samantha from the library who studies neuroscience surely would not fall prey to this.” And I would beg to differ. All women behave this way. Sure, in some it is clearly more neurotic than in others, but even the most intelligent women will devote their attention to the object, aka man, in the environment that projects the most value.
So how exactly do you project value? First of all, you must assume it. You need to truly believe that you are a valuable man. Making a solid contribution to society definitely helps, but if all else fails, just mind-fuck yourself. If you don’t feel like you have value, question what makes someone valuable? Why can’t you have infinite value just for existing? Why do you need to do something in order to be valuable? Question your limiting beliefs and replace them with ones that empower you and give you a strong sense of self-worth. When you truly feel worthy of the hottest women, they will begin to feel that you are actually worth their time and energy.
Now, this next point that I am about to make I literally cannot emphasize enough. So put down that lube, turn of the net porn, take your dick out of your hand, and pay attention. Here it is- *ahem* for the female gender of the species homo sapien *drumroll*... ATTRACTION IS NOT A CONSCIOUS CHOICE! Let me rephrase that in case you need clarification. Or in case you couldn’t stop arm wrestling with your one eyed weasel (lol). Women do not think about attraction. They don’t contemplate it in their minds. Even if they have a checklist of desirable qualities that they hope for in a man, if you know what you are doing, that list can be thrown out the fucking window. Because attraction is purely something that they feel. Attraction is always and only an emotional response for women.
The idea that women can be seduced mentally is complete and utter bullshit. Instead, they get a feeling impression of you based on your behavior and the quality of your self-expression. The way in which you convey yourself matters infinitely more than the content that you are conveying. Remember that. Tattoo it on your forehead if you have to. And for the love of God, quit dating Mrs. Palmer and her five daughters. They have had enough of you already.
In truth, the fact that attraction is not a conscious choice is the case for men as well. When you see a really hot woman, do you think about whether or not you are attracted to her? Of course not. You are just instantly drawn to her, to her physical beauty and her feminine essence. It is the same for women, although it usually does not happen as quickly. It takes more time for them to get a sense of who you are as a man and what exactly you bring to the table. But if you demonstrate the proper behaviors and subtle sub-communications that I discuss in this book, you can effectively trigger this subconscious attraction response in women on a consistent basis.
So my point is, never try to logically convince a woman into sleeping with you. It will never ever ever EVER work. Instead, get your behavior on point, master the way in which you express yourself, and the mode in which you carry yourself through life. That is more important than anything else. More important than looks, than money, than penis size... anything.
Now I want to discuss something that I describe as the Law of Attraction Equivalence. You know how you feel when you see a remarkably attractive woman and you just can’t seem to take your eyes off of her? She is just so sexy that it drives you out of your fucking mind and you just crave her with every fiber of your being. Now picture this. You can trigger the exact same feeling in women simply by displaying specific character traits! It is really that simple. And here is how you do it.
Most of us have had the experience of feeling really good about ourselves at a time in our lives. Feeling relaxed and at ease, like all is right with the world, like everything is working out for us. I hope that you have experienced this at least briefly at some point in your life, and if not then just trust me on this. When you are in this state, women respond to you differently. They feel naturally drawn to you because of your state of being. Many guys use alcohol so that they can get a taste of this fun and carefree vibe, and although it can work temporarily, it has far too many downsides to be a reliable method. Besides, crutches are never a permanent solution. What you need is a transformation in your character, an evolution in your state of consciousness, so to speak.
The reason why this relaxed, carefree vibe is so attractive is because it conveys several important things. First and foremost, it conveys that you are abundant, that you have enough to survive and thrive, and that all of your needs are met. Think of our ancestors- the alpha males of the group would have been very relaxed and at ease because they were able to easily get food, build shelter, protect themselves, and have sex, whereas the beta males would have been continuously anxious and under stress because they would have been less able to meet these needs. Even studies on other mammals, such as monkeys and rats, clearly indicate that the non-alpha members of the group who are not having sex tend to be far more anxious and neurotic, yet the ones who are attracting mates tend to be much calmer and more relaxed.
Another quality that a relaxed, carefree vibe indicates is your ability to handle and self-generate your own emotions. It shows the woman that you know how to deal with your inner emotional world and you are not completely at the whims of the stimulus being thrown at you from your external environment. This is an extremely attractive and masculine trait because it shows that you are solid and stable, that you are like a rock the woman can lean on and rest assured that it won’t give way. Women, on the other hand, are very easily tossed about by the stimulus in their environment, generally speaking, so they need this solid masculine figure that they are able to depend on.
So the development of these intangible traits in you personality and character is really the foundation of becoming an attractive man who can get laid with ease. But how you go about transforming your internal state ultimately is a subjective thing. I laid out the groundwork earlier in this book, however the one rule that is universal is this- come hell or high water, thou must follow thine bliss. Always do what brings you the most joy in life, and tell everything and everyone else to fuck off. If you aren’t doing what you love, then you are making excuses, plain and simple. Find a way. Believe me, there is always a way.
Your path to upgrading your state of being may be somewhat different from the next guy, but there are specific guidelines that can be helpful to follow when meeting women. Keep in mind that these guidelines will take you from first meeting all the way to sex with the girls that like you. Some girls won’t like you, and that’s okay. If it ain’t gonna happen, then just move on. There is always a girl out there for you. So, without further ado, I dub these the “Ten Commandments of Pick-up”:
Thou MUST approach- you see an attractive girl, APPROACH! I don’t care if she is with her mom, kissing her boyfriend, or if she is getting fucking married. (I joke but you get the point) APPROACH!!!
Always Assumeth Attraction- always assume that the girl likes you, or will like you, to the absolute best of your ability in that moment. Never doubt yourself or even consider the possibility that you are somehow unworthy or not enough. YOU ARE ENOUGH!!!
Center Thyself in Presence- Totally immerse yourself in the moment at hand. Do not think of what you are going to say next, do not wonder about what the girl is thinking, do not judge the girl or yourself as the two of you interact. Just pay attention. Be there. Feel all the sensations as closely and intimately as you can. EMBRACE THE MOMENT!!!
Amplify Thine State- Do whatever the fuck is necessary to amplify your state, to make the interaction more fun and enjoyable for you and ultimately for the girl as well. Even if amusing yourself means creating some conflict or breaking rapport, that’s okay. Of course, remember to be socially aware and to not go too far, but at the same time remember that you can always calibrate after the fact. HAVE FUN!!!
Buildeth Thine Comfort- Create rapport with the girl by being as real, authentic and congruent as possible. Be honest with her. Reveal your true self, be completely transparent to your true thoughts and feelings. This may be scary at first and will probably make you feel vulnerable, but the payoff is well worth it. Trust me. BE REAL!!!
Readeth Thine Body Language- Observe the way that the girl responds to you. Does she look open and relaxed? Is she laughing and smiling? Or does she look tense and uncomfortable? Pay attention to how she is feeling, tune in to her emotions. Then adjust your game to create more comfort. BE EMPATHIC TO THE WAY SHE FEELS!!!
Escalate Thoust Physically- As soon as you see that the girl is open to your presence and feels comfortable with you, begin escalating physically. This can begin with a simple handshake. Then, with her hand in yours, you can spin her around, try to pull her to a different location, or just do whatever the fuck you want. You can dance with her, nudge or poke her playfully, or you can hug her as a reward for saying something that you like. Whatever feels comfortable for both of you. TOUCH THE GIRL!!!
Dost Learneth Logistics- Once a degree of comfort is built, you have established a connection, and you have related with her as a man to a woman (created sexual tension) so your intentions are clear, ask about her logistics. What is she doing now? What is she doing later? Who is she there with? Find out if there is any way that you can further the interaction in a more private and intimate setting. ASK HER!!!
Bringeth To Thine Point of Climax- This one is HUGE. Too many guys end interactions too early when they could have gone much further. Do not settle for a measly number if you don’t have to. Go for the coffee date, tell her that there is an after party, bring her for food or just for an adventure. Only settle for the phone number if there is absolutely NO other choice. PULL HARD!!!
Get Laid Me Lord- Now is the moment that you have been waiting for. You have the girl alone. You know she wants you. You can feel the sexual tension getting stronger and stronger. You know that her panties are like the Himalayas during monsoon season. She’s squeezing you tightly when you kiss and her eyes are just begging you to fuck her already. Now is not the time to overthink. Just go with the flow of the moment, and just do what feels natural and good for you. Take off her clothes and get it in bro. (I do recommend condom usage but ultimately that’s up to you) Bask in the eternal glory of your first lay as a real man! FUCK THE GIRL!!!
Dynamite Tips On the Dynamics of Female Attraction-
Establish VALUE. Value is based on your ability to make the girl feel good and generate (mostly) positive emotions. When you have already created a degree of connection and rapport though, it can be extremely effective to break that rapport and use what are often referred to as “negs”. Critique something about the girl, whether that be her appearance or behavior. Disapprove of something. Or seem distracted and look away while she is talking. This will cause her to try and get your attention back or get you to like her again and it forces her to emotionally invest. But you HAVE TO establish a connection and good emotions to begin with and get her to like you first so that she is willing to invest.
You can also think of this as two steps forward, one step back. This works well when the girl is really into you as well as when she is throwing up some resistance. If she is resisting your advances, then simply take a step back and appear unphased. Then when she opens up a bit more you can try to escalate again. But never overdo it or escalate too quickly. That just comes across as needy and uncalibrated.
Another situation in which this method is quite effective is when the girl is really into you and wants you to escalate more, but you just take a step back and play it cool. This nonchalant attitude displays non-neediness and the fact that you can simply take it or leave it. It indicates high levels of abundance and MASSIVE value. This works especially well with the really hot girls, because they are so used to guys jumping at any opportunity to get physical with them, so you will be like a long awaited breath of fresh air that she will be dying to take in.
Always be at the CAUSE and not the effect. Get the girl to react to you. If you are reacting to the girl in any way, shape, or form, you are fucked. You need to be at the cause in the interaction and not the effect. You are the man, therefore you take the lead. Relate with her as a man to a woman. Be firm in your actions and confident in your behavior. Direct the interaction where you want it to go and direct the girl where you want her to go.
Establish the frame that you are the buyer and she is the seller. Consider the interaction like you are buying a new car. Are you going to buy it just because it looks nice? Fuck no! It could be a complete dud on the inside. So you inspect it meticulously, you ask the salesman questions, you look for flaws and reasons why it may not be the right car for you. And if you end up liking it and it’s a good deal, you buy it. You should look at the girl the same way. She might look good, but find out if there is more to her. Examine her more intangible qualities and ask her about them. “Are you smart?” “Are you adventurous?” Or even “Are you good in bed?” These types of questions are good questions to ask.
Remember not to fall into interview mode though. To avoid this, simply turn your would-be question into a statement. “You look smart” or “You seem like you would be adventurous” are great ways to rephrase it. You will generally get the same response from her, as if you asked a question, yet you won’t come across like you are hounding her for information.
You have to superimpose your frame onto the woman’s reality. You frame MUST be stronger than hers. You need to LEAD. Women like to take the submissive role, it is natural for them. They like to be led by a strong man who knows what he is doing and where he is going. A man who has clear intentions and a clear and specific purpose in life. A man who walks his path with power, audacity and absolute certainty.
It will be easy to get some women to fall into your frame and they will let you lead them around with very little effort on your part. You will notice this when their eyes become larger, their pupils may dilate, and they generally have a very warm, open and inviting demeanor. They may laugh easily and act very flirtatious. This means that they are ready to fully receive you. With other women, it can be more like trying to jam a square peg into a round hole. They need to “feel you out” more, so to speak, before they will fall into your frame and allow you to lead them. So what you have to do here is build more rapport, aka comfort, and by doing this you effectively reshape her round hole into a square.
Now the women who are more difficult to “hook” or to pull into your frame so that you can lead them will often have three main factors in common. They will have the “hot girl blasé” which is sort of like a “too cool for school” attitude where they are just unimpressed and unmoved by you. They will have what I like to call a “bitch shield” where they may make rude remarks, saying things like “Is that your pick-up line” and generally look at you with a bitchy face that tells you to fuck off. And the last factor is that they will shit test you. They will say things like “You dress weird”, or “You seem like you would be gay” or “You are probably a loser who lives in your mom’s basement.”
A girl may seem to convey all of these characteristics or could only have one. Either way, the key to overcome all of them is to stay NONREACTIVE. Brush it off like it is nothing. Or better yet, laugh at it. The very best way to overcome the hot girl blasé, break through the bitch shield, and ace her shit tests is through authentic humor and self-amusement. The other option is to simply ignore it as if it didn’t happen or doesn’t exist and just plow through it, so to speak. Remember though that some girls are simply negative people and they will be rude to you for seemingly no reason. They are not “testing” you, they are just mean and unpleasant people. Run from these girls as fast as you can.
I really want to make this point clear. If you have social anxiety, YOU ARE NORMAL! It is absolutely natural to experience a degree of anxiety in social situations, especially around people who you do not know. It is actually a biological response mechanism. Here is why. Back in the day, our ancestors are believed to have existed in approximately 150 person tribes. They would have been familiar with all of the people in their tribe, they would have shared similar customs and forms of communication, and generally speaking they would have felt quite comfortable around these people.
If they saw a stranger, however, or people who they did not know, it would have meant that conflict was either very possible or imminent. It would have been possible that they were encroaching on another tribe’s territory and, due to lack of an ability to effectively communicate with foreign tribes, these encounters would likely have led to some form of conflict. Therefore, an anxiety response formed around interactions with strange people and the humans who had these social inhibitions and avoided strangers lived long enough to reproduce and therefore passed on their genes to us. The problem with this, however, is that this impulse is more of a hindrance than a help in this day and age.
A small caveat here is that our male ancestors would have had a strong anxiety response formed around approaching attractive women because it would be very likely that these women already had an alpha male partner/leader and therefore if you attempted to have sex with her he would come and kill you. So this led to an even greater anxiety response mechanism wired into our male ancestors to prevent them from approaching attractive women and these males lived to pass on those traits to us.
Now, generally speaking, public encounters with new individuals are not a real danger in modern times. Most people do not intend to harm you, will not feel threatened by you encroaching upon their territory, and are usually safe to interact with. But our brains often tell us otherwise. So the key to overcome this is to overwhelm you brain with new interactions and progressively desensitize your nervous system. The most important thing is to go out and meet new people on a consistent basis. Your brain will soon learn that it is safe to do so and thus rewire itself naturally because it wants to minimize energy expenditure. If you isolate yourself for any significant period of time though, the anxiety response will return by default. So you have to constantly be meeting new people and, of course, be approaching attractive girls.
Now, one of the biggest causes of the modern chode epidemic that we see around the world is none other than the mass media and entertainment industry. Flip on your average rom-com and what do you see? Usually, some sort of awkward, needy or emasculated male who meets a beautiful woman and “falls in love”. He does all kinds of things to woo her and demonstrate how much he really loves her, and once she has seen sufficient evidence of his love she decides to be with him and they live happily ever after.
Now, although this may be cute and somewhat endearing, what is the problem with it? The problem is that it trains men to adopt extremely unattractive qualities in the hopes that it will gain them a woman’s love and affection. And it NEVER fucking works. Usually it does the exact opposite. The only case in which this may possibly be an effective strategy is when the girl already really likes you. Then if you demonstrate that you like her too, it is a validating experience for the woman and makes her feel good. If she doesn’t like you yet, or worse, if she doesn’t even know you, she finds these behaviors extremely repulsive. You will come off as very weak, meek, and needy, and as I said before, these are not attractive qualities in men.
So instead of engaging in these beta behaviors that you are bombarded with through movies and television, just do what I have outlined in this book. Use the strategies that I have presented you with to retrain your mind and rewire your brain to do things that are actually attractive to women and effective in gaining long-term love and affection from the opposite sex.
Now, I’m going to go over some strategies and behaviors that are extremely important and that you have probably heard of before but are definitely worth re-emphasizing:
Eye contact- having strong eye contact is one of the most attractive qualities in a man. A woman can tell everything about you by your eye contact. They say that the eyes are the window to the soul, but I think it would be more accurate to say that the eyes are the window to your state. People, and especially women, can tell the state you are in emotionally and where your head is at simply by looking into your eyes. If you are relaxed, at ease, and somewhat turned on while talking to her, she will sense this and open up to you. Whatever you are feeling is transferred on to the woman, so do things that turn you on and amplify your own state.
Body language- if the eyes are the window to your state, then body language is the window to your self-esteem. How you carry yourself is a clear indicator of how you feel about yourself. If you walk around hunched over and staring at the ground you give off the impression that you are a man with low self-esteem. However, if you carry yourself with strong posture, with your shoulders back and your head tilted up slightly, you give off the impression that you are a highly confident and attractive man. So consciously monitor you body language and adjust it whenever you get too tight, hunched over, or rigid. You want to stay loose and relaxed. Start doing yoga if you have to, it will help you stay limber and is a fantastic way to meet hot chicks. Remember not to overdo the whole posture thing though. You want to make it look and feel as natural as possible, although if you have bad posture now it will most likely feel odd at first. Do it anyway.
Vocal tonality- you want to speak in a way that is commanding and projects value with your voice. Speak loudly and clearly and enunciate your words well. Do not speak too fast but speak at a moderate pace as though you actually care about what you have to say. Feel the words rising from your balls and coming out your mouth, and sense the vibration reverberating through you. You want your words to carry depth and power. And you want to speak in a way that breaks rapport. That is, drop your tone on the last word of a sentence instead of raising your tone, which is rapport seeking. Think of your high school math class when your teacher would ask you a question and you were unsure of your answer, so you would say it as though your were asking a question yourself. “43?” This is not what you want to do. Speak as though you are absolutely certain of what you have to say, and drop your tone at the end of each question or statement.
Physical escalation- I discussed this earlier in the book, yet it is worth mentioning again because it is such an important aspect of your game and being an overall attractive man. When it comes to escalating physically, aka touching the girl, you want to do it in a way that feels as natural as possible, yet at the same time you want to do it as quickly as possible. You don’t want to just stand there with your hands in your pockets or twiddling your thumbs like a dumbass allowing the interaction to just fizzle out. You always want the interaction to be moving forward, to be building towards sex, and a key part of this is getting physical with the girl.
Rapport with friends- if a girl that you are interested in is with her friends, you always want to build rapport with them. That is, you want to get them on your side. When the friends are on your side, it is far easier to isolate the girl and get sexual with her. You want to build rapport and be friendly to a certain point, but don’t hit on the friends too much because the girl may think that you are more interested in them and leave. So be nice and friendly to her group, but stick with your desired girl when it comes to making the vibe sexual and flirtatious. If the friends aren’t having it, the last resort is to be more commanding and take the lead by basically telling the friends, playfully and politely, to fuck off and then pulling the girl away. If you really can’t get anywhere then just get the number and bounce.
Make your intentions clear- You always want the girl to be well aware of your intentions. Do you simply want to chat in a friendly way, do you want to take her on a date, do you want to dance with her, do you want to make out, or do you just want to take her and fuck her now? Make her aware of your intentions at all times through your words and actions. Even if she turns you down, at least she knows what’s up. And if you get her number, make it extremely clear that you intend to see her again. Convey the fact that you are getting the number in order to arrange a time and a place for the two of you to meet up. And also make sure that she has invested enough emotionally to be willing to see you again.
Authenticity always wins- you always want to be as authentic as possible and congruent to your true thoughts, feelings, and desires. You want to be transparent and give the girl a clear window into your inner world. She needs to be able to feel that you are trustworthy and that you have nothing to hide. She needs to know that your intentions are purely positive and you simply want to make her feel good and improve her life. You want to give her an amazing experience. If you don’t want to make the girl feel good, if you don’t want to give her an amazing experience, and if you just want to use her as a warm hole to get your nut off, then you don’t deserve her in the first place, because you are a piece of shit. I don’t mean to be harsh, but this is the truth. Your primary intention should always be to give her love and positive emotions and to make her life better.
Take charge- you absolutely must take charge and lead during the interaction. The girl won’t do it for you. It’s not her job. If you really want her, you must take her, so long as she is a willing participant of course. You want to be assertive, yet relaxed at the same time, aggressive, yet playful. A girl may like you, but 99.99% of the time she is not going to lead things forward for you. Remember, she is the woman, so she naturally takes the submissive frame. You are the man, so you must always assume the dominant frame. Imagine that you are the sun and she is a planet in your orbit. Lead her where you want to go at all times and if she objects simply take a step back and build more comfort. Then go from there.
Care about the girl’s inner world- show a genuine interest in getting to know her. Try to get an idea of what it is like to be her and walk in her shoes. When a girl can sense that you actually care about her and you want to get to know her better, and that you aren’t just trying to get into her pants, she will find you far more attractive.
Now I want to address the key differences between day game and night/club game. Generally speaking, during the day the best approach is more calm and relaxed, and at night it’s more intense and high energy. Other than that the dynamics are fundamentally the same.
Usually during the day the girls are just kind of going about their boring routine, so a super intense and high energy approach doesn't usually mesh well with their reality. It’s too overwhelming for her to handle with any degree of comfort. If it is at night and they are out having fun in a loud environment, then a really subtle and low energy approach usually won’t work that well. You want to be more intense, more high energy and more over the top at night to get the girl’s attention focused on you so you can hook her into your frame.
During the day it is also usually better to be more indirect with your speech, yet make your intentions clear though sub-communication. For example, don’t tell her straight up that she is hot and that you want to fuck her. Instead, make that abundantly clear through your eye contact/body language and then escalate physically as quickly as possible so she is aware of your intentions and knows that the dynamic of the interaction is "man to woman" instead of "friend to friend".
During the day, immediately telling the girl that you really like her puts too much pressure on her and makes her think "this guy doesn't even know me and he wants to fuck me." It can also make her afraid that she cannot live up to your expectations. Not to mention it makes you seem too desperate and less valuable in her eyes. So don’t do that. You also want to try and move with her as fast as possible to a different location and take her on an "instant date". Always just assume that she wants to go and pull her away unless she really protests and absolutely cannot do it due to a time constraint. Then just get the number.
At night, it is ok to be more direct and sexual with your verbal communication because the girls are expecting it and/or are drunk. They won’t be as freaked out by a guy getting sexual in a club as opposed to in a coffee shop. If you try to grind with a girl in the line at Starbucks, it probably isn’t going to end well, unless your game is dope as fuck. So it is all about melding your vibe so that it fits in with the environment, yet at the same time being the value and acting out of your own intent. If you stand out too much, you come across as a weirdo and the girl doesn’t feel as though she can really trust you. It makes it too difficult to build enough comfort for the two of you to get more intimate quickly. You want to stand out just enough so that she can see you are different, but in an intriguing and attractive way.
This is also an important point that I see a lot of guys fucking up during the day. NEVER ASK IF SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND!!! If it is a concern to her, then she will most definitely mention it. Plenty of girls will hook up with you even if they have a "boyfriend" and others lie about having a boyfriend so that they can escape the social pressure of interacting with a stranger. But if you just avoid the boyfriend topic altogether and let the girl get to know you better, she will start to feel more comfortable around you and you can then begin to escalate more sexually.
At night, however, it can be wise to ask the girl if she has a boyfriend so you aren’t surprised by it later and so you don’t waste your night interacting with a girl that you can’t fuck. It is not always a deal breaker but it is certainly a good thing to be aware of. You want to clarify her logistics as quickly as possible so you can find the girl with whom you can have sex that same night. With the others who have bad logistics just get their numbers and do your absolute best to ensure a future date.
So in conclusion, mastering the psychology of female attraction really comes down to mastering your own vibe and the intangible qualities and values that you carry within yourself as a man. Developing your character and striving for self-improvement in life is the cornerstone for success in all areas, including women and dating. When you have the foundation of a strong character and you fully immerse yourself in social situations with hot women, it is impossible to remain unsuccessful. So take the advice that I have given you by applying what you have learned, be sure to follow the guidelines that I’ve laid out, always do that which turns you on the most in life, and of fucking course, GET LAID!!!
*WARNING* Over-Analysis Paralysis- Now this is a key point that I have to address. A lot of guys who get into the pick-up community, or just research advice on women and dating, can fall into a trap that I like to call the Over-Analysis Paralysis. This happens when you over-analyze a topic to such an extent and you absorb so much information on the subject that it literally paralyzes you. You become a jumbled up neurotic mess and you can’t get yourself to take action and interact with women. Or when you do there is an onslaught of ideas and information that assaults your brain and makes you come across as distracted, uncalibrated, and just plain weird. So above all, the most important thing is to GO OUT! Get firsthand experience in the field and then refer to some relevant information so you can overcome any sticking points that you may have come across in your game. Simply sitting around and studying this stuff is a WASTE OF TIME! So get off your ass and talk to some chicks.
*Put a challenge at the end of each chapter- one could be doing retarded stuff like dances or whatnot to kill your self-image and unstifle yourself. Another could be simply going up to five girls and giving them a genuine compliment.
Taking action- exercises from newbie to advanced.
No comments:
Post a Comment